This comes after pondering the book “The Voice of Knowledge” by Don Miguel Ruiz, one of my favorite authors.
Have you ever met someone insanely different who is just so confident in themselves you can’t help but love them? Some people are so strange and out there. They’re unique because they’re true to themselves, at least as much as they can be. We’re all born unique. We should be living that way. These people that just have this energy about them, they’re so different and yet completely unapologetic about it…I think it’s because they really feel themselves. They’re so confident because how could you question anything that is genuinely you. Why would you deny yourself anything that comes from your soul?
Do you know who you are? Most of us are unaware of the layers we have built around our souls. Being what we really want, letting ourselves truly go and play and act like children seems almost like a task, when really, we should have remained that way all along. Because that is what we really are.
Society teaches us the rules of the road…how to dress, how to talk, how to take in media, how to eat, how to take pictures, how to travel…we learn them and are domesticated. We act like normal humans. We live a lie and we lie to ourselves so much that we become confident in that lie.
That’s why when we’re younger and we’re still figuring out “who we want to be” we’re not so confident. It’s not because we haven’t “found ourselves yet.” You don’t ever lose yourself…you’re always still there…you might just be deep down underneath some lies already. We’re just beginning to build up these lies as we’re in middle school and high school and we’re not sure where this mystical personal draws the line on certain things, we’re not sure what she will do and what she won’t do, we’re not sure how much she speaks up, if she is a rule breaker or follower, or if she’s a slut or a saint. So we are weak and shaky.
Then we grow up. We start believing all our lies and they become so numerous that they completely define us. We become confident in our lies. All of these things that we’ve heard from the outside that we’re taking on and making our “own.” These lines that our fed to us: be this way and be that way. They become us. Or at least that’s what we believe. But are you really that way? When you’re born you have a personality. You have a soul. Yes, you need a framework to base your beliefs, your communications, your actions. But is any of that actually you? Surely, the only things that are genuinely you are the things that you were born with. Involuntary emotions. When you’re a baby, when something makes pleases you, you laugh. When something displeases you, you cry. When someone makes you feel safe, you love them. That’s that.
But we lose this when we’re older because of this framework that we all invest our faith in. A framework that’s not even real. Necessary for normal human interaction, yes, but it’s not real. So we believe our lies and we lie to ourselves and we lie to others and we tell ourselves we’re happy.
But it’s those people that have stopped listening to the lies and started listening to themselves, that are truly genuine, and therefore, truly happy.
And that, my friends, is intoxicating to be around. Who wants to meet the same people over and over? It’s those gems that are so out of the box, and yet so present and alive, that are addictive to spend time with. It’s what we should all strive to be…and yet, how do we make it there? We’ve got to strip down all our layers, we’ve got to un-believe the lies. You don’t need to rebuild yourself, because you are already there. Maybe we need to unbury ourselves. Return to ourselves. Call ourselves out from hiding.
I think I’m on my way to doing such a thing. I’m not there yet, but certainly this past year has taught me some things and uncovering myself and my inner confidence is one of them.
Watch this space for more on Kristen “un-burying” herself.